Summary of Week # 4
Now we look at the various life events (positive & negative) that have taken place from your first memory to present. The more significant the event, the longer the line associated with it. This helps us to identify some relationships and life events that we need to find some completion on. In life there are both positive & negative events and seeing the comparison can also help us gain perspective on how it affected us and what to do with those unfinished feelings.
As we look at what is unfinished, we look at the positives & negatives that came from these relationships / events. These unsaid things build up and can cause us to avoid relationships and life altogether. Often it is tackling relationships we don't like to talk about. It may be struggling to find anything positive (or negative) about a person. This may be a person who is still in your life (or not), where there are things that you wish were 'different, better, or more'. These things combined can cause fear in the present & future. Avoiding this will only cause us to feel stuck in our pain.
We then identify at least 3 incomplete relationships to tackle. We look at the positive & negative events about 1 relationship at a time. It is important to note that 'completing a relationship' doesn't mean you forget them. Completion helps us to deal with the unfinished items of the relationship that need to be dealt with. Life events like long illnesses are also losses that affect our finances, our routine, our sense of purpose & belonging and more. Unfinished relationships are ones that the hopes, dreams and expectations are incomplete. It may be a divorce or death, the death of a relationship which changes the connection to that person.